Further Reading: Feeling Your Feelings During Tough Transitions

Sharing our favorite resources, potluck-style.

"You have a support system of people who won’t fully share [your] specific ups and downs, but still can be there to lend support like in any intense situation you go through. It’s like a pot luck dinner, but for feelings. Nobody is going to give you everything you need, but everybody has something good to offer, even the friend who brings the emotional equivalent of plastic cups. Look, it’s not exactly a high-effort offer, but without cups…what will we drink out of???"

–

Josh Gondelman

A while ago, I posted the full newsletter from which this delightful quotation springs, written by my funny friend Josh. I’ve continued to noodle (pun half intended) on the idea of a potluck dinner, but for feelings. 

Photo by Caroline Hernandez on Unsplash

This idea arose organically again recently, after our first Initiation Writes get-together on Zoom, co-hosted with NUR Space, during which we discussed strategies for navigating the holidays as a highly-sensitive person.

There are so many ways to nurture our feelings during difficult initiations and rituals, including the holiday dinners we share with our loved ones, and the time feels right to invite some crowdsourcing here. 

I’m hoping this open, evergreen thread can also serve as a kind of roll call for readers here, in which we can share a bit about why we’re here, what we’re looking for, and what we can offer.

So, I’d love it if you’d post below: 

• Who are you? On whose land do you dwell? (Find out here.) What brings you to this digital space? 

• What is something you use to care for your feelings during tough transitions? Links are welcome, or you can simply describe your practice if it’s easy to envision without one. If you offer healing practices yourself in this regard or have a website/Substack dedicated to this, here’s your chance to shamelessly self-promote, with my enthusiastic consent. Who knows, maybe we’ll make a whole post or Initiation Writes interview about it together at a later date! 

  • Examples: Das Rush uses the notion of a “Sacred Five” meditation practice to navigate the demands of parenting a newborn. The Rev. Molly Bolton uses poetry to ease others suffering in her work as a Cleveland Clinic chaplain turned spiritual director. I am a fan of EMDR and grief gardening.

• What other resources for feeling your feelings would you like to receive?

  • Maybe you’re feeling less than jazzed about your current physical and tactile tools, and you’re looking for a new yoga practice, online crafts class, or weighted blanket recommendation.

  • Maybe you’re someone who is most regulated by visual, oral or auditory input, and you’re looking for a comfort food recipe or playlist to ease your passage into #hygge season here in the Northern Hemisphere.

  • Maybe you’re trying to make more time for true self-regulation rather than distraction, and curious about other people’s journaling or meditation routines — or you’re feeling the opposite, and looking to add something decidedly unserious to your nightstand to-read pile so that you can enjoy some screen-free autoregulation. (What’s the difference? This is a helpful explanation.) Anything goes, as long as it can be broadly interpreted as helping us to feel our feelings during liminal times. 

This is such a wise and kind community. I’m looking forward to hearing from you! And please feel free to share this prompt with anyone else you know who may be looking to share their wares with folks who are currently navigating a tough transition season.